Arrrgggh shiver me timbers Laddy, Monday September 19th is International Talk Like a Pirate Day so shut up and talk like a pirate.
What do pirates do on Talk Like a Pirate Day? Squaaaaaark Like A Parrot OI s’pose …
I’ll still be chantin’ Harrrri Krrrsna terday like Radharani’s parrot, but orso torken loik a poiret.
‘Ere be me own leetle version of me torken loik a poiret >>>
Arrrgggh! If ye be suffrin’ from white stuff on yer sholder, an’ it not be dandruff, arrrgggh, then ye be needin’ old Captin MacPherson’s Cocky Cack Remover, arrrgggh!
Best o’ the Best
To watch the very best poiret movie ever moid, ‘ave a peep at the YouTube movie “down below.” (Moid in 1986, a great year on th’ hoigh seas, me Littluns AND it be directed by Roman Polanskie!) Don’t worry, the Serbian subs are only there on YouTube and only if you turn them on … no need t’ be fearen.
Walter Matthau is the cantankerous Captain Red who pulls the whole show off in magnificent style.
Go orn, whoi darn ya be wochen Cappen Raed, arrrgggh!
Parental indulgence recommended.
Watch it here on a tiny little screen …
Or watch a larger version or watch it on YouTube on a much bigger full-screen. God gave yer intellygence. Think fer ye self Ladds ‘n’ Lassys.
This be also a good one
It be starrin ye olde Donald Sutherland, in ‘is proime, yo ho ho an’ a bottle ov rum.
Never moind the Turkish subtitles. Doin’t think even the Toorks an’ Crimeans ken understand Toikish writing, arrrgggh, they be sailin’ up the Bhosphorus without a paddle eef thoy eever troid. Oi, bring me a pannikin o’ rum, me Laddy. Where’s me crib, where’s me crib?
An’ fer a classique, Blackbeard the Pirate (1952):
An Australian production. Long John Silver (rare ultra wide screen version):
One with kids. A High Wind in Jamaica:
A real oldie with John Wayne. Wake Of The Red Witch 1948:
Bein’ a beeg fan of th’ earlie Duke (John Wayne) OI just ‘ad ter put this ‘ere.
Now OI haven’t watched all of these meseff, but yer can bet yer rum toddy ration that they’re all good fer tork loik a poiret doi. OI’ve seen the one wiv the chilldrern, A High Wind in Jamaica, good, fun and sad too, but that’s the way it’s made.
Arrrvve seen so much of the Walter Matthau (Cappen Red) Pirates – TWICE. Best ever.
I’ve seen the Treasure Island (but without Turkey subs), pretty good.
The Wake of the Red Witch is/isn’t strictly a pirate movie. Yes, piracy does occur but it’s more of a drama mystery (it’s a mystery why we watched it ) no – it’s a great movie, especially if you like John Wayne movies, glorious black and white, etc, a good plot, well acted, produced, different to today’s blockbuster crap. This one’s got some style.
So, answer me this:
Q. What goes 99 klunk?
A. A pirate centipede (with a wooden leg).
Q. What goes one klunk?
A. A pirate. Watch out.
In other bullshit today our roving reporter roved and reported, but nuffen much ter do wiff poirets.
The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range. Three weeks later, a sheep walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. The cowboy couldn’t believe his eyes. He took the precious book out of the sheep’s mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, “It’s a miracle!” “Not really,” said the sheep. “Your name is written inside the cover.”
A policeman in the big city stops a man in a car with a sheep in the front seat. “What are you doing with that sheep?” He exclaimed, “You should take it to the zoo.” The following week, the same policeman sees the same man with the sheep again in the front seat, with both of them wearing sunglasses. The policeman pulls him over. “I thought you were going to take that sheep to the zoo!” The man replied, “I did. We had such a good time we are going to the beach this weekend!”
How do You?
A student named Jacob was sitting in class one day and the teacher walked by and he asked her “How do you put an elephant in the fridge?” The teacher said “I don’t know, how?” Jacob then said “You open the door and put it in there!” Then Jacob asked the teacher another question “How do you put a sheep in the fridge?” The teacher then replied “Ohh I know this one, you open the door and put it in there?” Jacob said “No, you open the door, take the elephant out, and then you put it in there.” Then he asked another question…”All the animals went to the lions birthday party, except one animal, which one was it?” The teacher a bit confused and said “The lion?” Then the student said “No, the sheep because he’s still in the fridge.” then he asked her just one more question….”If there is a river full of crocodiles and you wanted to get across it,how would you” The teacher then says “You would walk over the bridge.” Then Jacob says “No, you would swim across because all the crocodiles are at the lions birthday party!”
Wine Appreciation Course
Don’t Drink it, you’ll appreciate it much more that way. It tastes disgusting.
Candle one to candle two, “Will you be home later tonight?
“No, I’ll be going out soon.”
All the Madmen
“I’d rather stay here with all the madmen than to run with the sadmen running free.
I’d rather play here with all the madmen ‘cos I’m quite content they’re all as sane as me.”
Dress Code for Today
Black tie and straight jacket
… not ta mention poiret hat an’ boots of Spanish leather.
Arrrgggh! Them wots dresst proply maybe won’t be standin’ a floggen at the yardarm, arrgggh, an’ thatsa fact, me little luvleys.
Arrrgggh Jim Hawkins me lad arrrgggh!
a toxic xombie